Holidays are full of hustle and bustle, tradition, travel , noise and family .For most of us, it has a bit of stress added in. For children and adults with hearing loss, there can also be extra stress and loneliness.

At first thought, you might find this odd..this is the BEST time of  the year, right? Well, try to imagine yourself from their point of view. If a child or adult only signs and the family and friends with whom they get together with during the holidays do not sign, this makes communicating very hard. Perhaps some people have taken time or interest and know some basic greetings..but after that, people often  talk quickly and move on. If a child or adult uses  listening and spoken language, it is not necessarily much easier. People speak fast, there is background noise, people are moving all over while talking, which distorts their voice and makes it very hard for someone to speech read.  Often, children and adults with hearing loss became extremely lonely and feel left out. 

There is hope. Plan ahead. If you are inviting  people with hearing loss to your home, have paper and pencil or  technology available to make communication flow easier. If you are  a parent or spouse of someone with hearing loss going to someone's home, bring some communication options along.   Set up seating in a semi circle, so people can all see each other. Remind people to get the  person with hearing loss' attention first, before speaking or signing. 

This may not make the communication perfect, but it will allow that person to feel intentionally included. This helps that person want to advocate more and some of the loneliness can disappear. 

Another great idea is to buy some movies or books for the child with hearing loss that have characters in them who have hearing loss, so they can relate. It is also a great idea to get them for the families who don't have hearing loss, so they can start to learn about hearing loss.

People  in 2018 are very aware of labels, names, categories, etc. It is  not politically correct to call people "disabled",but some people prefer to be called 'disabled.' Others prefer to be called "differently abled." I have learned long ago, that it is not my place to decide what to "label" or "call " people. I do my best and hope people will politely share with me how they would like to be addressed.

When it comes to hearing loss, there are  many ways people want to be addressed. Some people say, "Deaf". Some people say,  "deaf". Some people say, " hearing impaired," while others feel offended by that term. Some people say, " hard of hearing " even if they have no hearing and  use a cochlear implant. 

When I work with my students, I   try to explain the medical terms vs the cultural terms. It is not my place to decide for them how they refer to themselves,but I do try to educate.

If a person is 'deaf', that literally means that on an audiogram, when their hearing is tested, they  have a significant hearing loss. That means they can not hear without  amplification.  For some, it means that even with hearing aids, there is no  understandable hearing. This person may use a cochlear implant and be able to understand spoken language after much therapy. For someone to be labeled "hard of hearing", it usually means a person has  hearing loss,but in the mid ranges. This person does get benefit from a hearing aid and is able to understand spoken language. 

When a person identifies himself as " Deaf", it is related to culture. It means he feels he belongs to the Deaf culture-knows/uses American Sign Language, does not feel like he has "lost" anything because he can 't hear some or all spoken language.  He may have a significant hearing loss or a mild one,but it is how he culturally  feels.  A person who  calls herself "hearing impaired "  usually is someone who fits in more with the hearing world and sees the hearing loss as a deficit medically, not  a culture. 

There is no right or wrong way a person should label  herself.   People 's perspectives and understanding of their hearing losses may change over their lives, due to changing hearing loss or due to the people they  meet. It saddens me when one group tells the other group that they are  wrong.  My hope is that people in both the 'deaf' and the "Deaf" community can come together and be open for all people to flow in and out of each group.